March Winds and April Showers

According to the Mother Goose rhyme these two weather events bring May flowers. We can only hope, because this has been a really nasty winter. Even those of us who live in SOG City, normally the warmer part of Hillsborough County, have been freezing our nuts off. Well, those of us who had them to begin with. The other half of our citizenry have had other appendages to worry about I am sure. Anyway, I am grateful that the freezes seem to have gone even though the winds have been gusting with gusto.

We had a leaf catcher installed in our back yard a number of years ago and it has been working overtime of late. Every frigging leaf in the neighborhood lands there. That wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t have to scoop them out…daily. In addition to scooping leaves it is also necessary to replenish the chlorine levels since leaves seem to love chlorine and just suck it up.

If I had it to do over I would have eschewed the leaf catcher and just let the damn things fall on the ground and stay there. Once on the ground they are no longer leaves, they become mulch and are much cheaper than what I buy on a regular basis from Home Depot. This brings to mind, if Home Depot stock is up they can thank me. Between the home and garden I am supporting them, and they are welcome.

I suggested to the lady of the house the other day that I could cut back on my workload by shutting off the automatic chlorinator, tossing a couple of wheelbarrows of dirt along with some aquatic plants into the leaf catcher and then add some catfish or tilapia. Instead of dipping leaves, since I don’t think fish care one way or the other about leaves, we could sit by the edge our new pond, drink beer and fish for dinner.

“That’s not a pond, you freaking idiot,” or words to that effect she screamed. “It’s a freaking swimming pool and I am not swimming with a bunch of freaking fish.” My entreaties for a green environment and reducing our carbon footprint fell on deaf female ears.

Women can be such poops!