America: The United States of Fatties

I saw a story on FOX, the Manufactured News Network, the other day that cited an unconfirmed and totally erroneous blogger report that the United States was in danger of sinking beneath the waves of the adjacent oceans. And, before you get your boxers in a bunch, it has nothing to do with global warming which everyone, except those with a brain, knows to be false.

According to the unnamed blogger, the oceans are not rising. This country is sinking under the unbearable weight of a large...huge...give me a second, the word will come to me...obese segment of our population. I exclude those with a medical condition that contributes to their weight problem. I am referring to those average Americans who cram this country's abundance of food down their guts like it would be their last meal and then sit around on their fat asses watching FOX invent the news.

Before you fatties get your blimp sized bloomers in a wad let me admit that we too were more than pleasingly plump a year or so ago. As of today we have dropped over a hundred pounds of fat between the two of us. Actually, those fat wads are not sitting in a pile between us. We pretty much left them on the streets and byways of SOG City where we do a three to five mile walk at least six days a week. It is amazing what exercise, cutting back on food consumption, and drinking diet beer can accomplish.

Clean living, following intellectual pursuits, and living a life mindful of the world around you with a heartfelt concern for all peoples and the environment can contribute so much to a happier, healthier you.

In retrospect, this might not be the shining example I was hoping for.

And, in closing:



Thanks to Fat Bellies Pictures, FreakingNews.com, and YouTube.com.