The Belle of Ballast Point and I decided to spend a few of our remaining days on St. Pete Beach at the Trade Winds Island Grand soaking up some rays and copious amounts of rummy drinks. We figured that since we were Biblically doomed we might as well go out with a buzz on; besides, we really enjoyed our stay last year at this resort.
I have purposely scheduled this missive to appear, as if by magic, precisely at 5 o'clock this morning because a clock on the Judgement Day website indicated that the end-of-time poop would hit the end-of-time fan at precisely that hour. I am assuming eastern daylight time, though the web site was not specific on a time zone.
To my great surprise, before leaving SOG City for the beach I discovered that the Earth won't be annihilated today. That is a good thing considering that we are booked at the Trade Winds through Sunday.
On the contrary, after checking in with the resident doom-sayer of Family Radio, Harold Camping, I discovered that "the timeline of history is God's predetermined timetable for the unfolding of God's Gospel program for this world. In other words, it is the length of time between the day God created this world in 11,013 B.C. and the day he will destroy it in October 21, 2011."
Damn, but this guy is just a fountain of stuff I never suspected.
Anyway, since the world won't be de-constructed until October, I think the best we can hope for today is maybe seeing a few of our neighbors floating up to their heavenly Xanadu and the promised seventy vestal virgins. Why anyone would want an inexperienced sex partner, much less seventy of them, is a great mystery to me. But, to each his own.
Hopefully, when we get back from our little mini-vacation I will have some pictures to share with you - maybe some celestial floaters if we see some beaming up at the resort. In the meantime, I encourage you to take a gander at the Family Radio website where you will discover tremulous things.
For instance, the world was created exactly 13,024 years ago, the Bible states that before 1988 no one could know when to expect Jesus to return, finally, two and only two people are able to un-lock God's secrets for Judgement Day - Harold Camping and Jesus Christ himself. And, you thought Trump was arrogant!
Praise be to the delusional.
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