Both Sides Now

Blowing it out of both sides of his...uh, orifice Rick Scott (R - I bought Florida, nanny, nanny, boo boo) stated that should Isaac pay us a visit during the RNC, “Local teams will make evacuation plans for their areas depending on what happens. The convention will make its own decision. The goal is that you have everybody together, we’ll have the same information and can coordinate our efforts and work together.”

While Scott is scheduled to speak at the convention Monday evening, he did mention that he will have to decide later in the week if he will be available. Said the prick with ears, “I’m responsible for the 19 million people who live here and the visitors,” Scott said. “That’s what my focus will be.”

As a consequence, should Isaac come a-calling, Scott is apparently handing off his Goobernator responsibilities to the RNC. Scott did not reveal where he will be focusing from, but some crass individuals speculate it will be from the super secret Koch brothers retreat in Vail, Colorado.

Most all of this is unsubstantiated speculation, so there!